God sent me an ANGEL

I have been sooooo BLESSED these last few months with the bmb.

An incredible bm called me awhile back to let me know she wants to be involved with bmb.
I was excited and thrilled to have her on board.

She has done so much in such a short time
and this weekend I will get the opportunity to meet her face to face.

I am so blessed, grateful and excited for the future of bmb.

Thank you Jenny for following your heart, listening to the spirit and getting involved.

THE SKY IS THE LIMIT!

ADOPTION PRODUCTS

found a few things I thought were worth sharing

cutest CAR magnet

The r House on Etsy.com
{has the most adorable adoption related items}

Chosen

Gift Ideas

Blogs worth sharing

United By Love

Families Supporting Adoption

more to come!

Having One Of Those Days...

a random spurt of emotions have gone through me today...
placement is funny that way
each emotion, each milestone
is a little different then the one before
different ideas on how to cope or deal with each one varies

but one thing stays the same...
that burning feeling
to want to hold her, talk to her,
walk with her, listen to her,
meet her, admire her,
dream with her
and just be with her.

miss you today!

I NEED...

I have been blessed with great donations in the last month or so, but I am in need of items that are easy to ship.
Jewelry
Music/Book CD's
Magazines
Gift Certificates
Coupons
Ribbon
Tissue Paper
Purse/handbag that will hold items!
I've been shipping more baskets then I have been dropping off. I've been placing the basket items in cure 'bags' since they are easier to ship then the baskets... but I am in need of more donations!! Please, talk your wards who are playing Enrichment Nights, suggest the baskets as a project, post my blog on your blog, Facebook, Twitter.

Please! Help me reach ALL of these amazing birth moms who need to know they are NOT alone!
(click to enlarge)
I'm starting an AUCTION for one of my paintings,
to earn money for the bmb.
100% of the proceeds will go into items for the baskets and shipping cost.

The Painting is...
'Dandelion Meadow'
18x24
acrylic paints on stretched canvas
ready to hang or frame
it's beautiful
and will be beautiful in your home
or as a gift!!!

I will start the AUCTION Friday Jan. 15th
(more info to come)

2010

It's a NEW year full of exciting things for bmb. I've already sent out 3 baskets this month and I am receiving great feedback from those baskets.
My heart is full and I feel grateful that I can be the force behind this AMAZING cause.
Please remember, I'm always looking for donations, I'm always looking for an opportunity to speak and would love for everyone to set a goal with me this year to
serve! serve! serve!
There are many, many birth moms out there that I'm not reaching... please again share this blog with your friends, family and neighbors.
The more people that know the more baskets we can fill!
Happy New Year to ALL of you!

"

What Can YOU Get @ Pier 1 for $20???

A LOT OF great stuff!!!

My wonderful friend BECKY donated a $20 Pier 1 Gift Certificate to the BMB's.
I was sooo excited to go see what I could find that would be FABulous in the baskets!
I was amazed at what I was able to get... and I really think I should go get more :)
8 journals .88 cents/journal
6 Star Pumice .68 cents/star
3 of the Yummiest Strawberry soap! .98 cents/bar
2 Little make-up bags $1.48/bagand 2 of the cutest HEART shaped key chains with lots of BLING!
$1.00 each!

Thank you Becky for your donation!!

Hopefully, this will HELP you all it doesn't take much to go a LONG way.
Every penny counts and I spend time make sure every penny is spent well.

So please, donate, collect good deals, share the BMB blog with your friends and...

Remember to have a BEAUTIFUL Christmas!

wondering...

Flipping through my baby's scrapbook... I can't believe how much time has gone by.
She looks so sweet and innocent in these pictures that I have of her at the hospital, and at my parents house. I notice how young ALL of my nieces and nephews look,
and how much they have grown.
I think about her.
I think about how much SHE has grown, how much she has learned
and what she has grown to LOVE.
I miss her dearly and looking at this precious lil' baby girl, my arms ache to hold that baby...
but she isn't a baby any more.
She is 9.
She has her own opinions, her own friends, her own desires and I wonder...
will I ever be apart of that?
Will I ever get to hear her wants, her needs, her passions?
I hope so. I pray so.

Just 11 days shy of Christmas... and my Christmas wish will be?
That she will be healthy, happy, loved and know in the back of her mind that I am there, hugging her, loving her and wanting so much to be apart of her life.
Merry Christmas Baby!

Thank you!!

thank you Roberts Craft for your COUPON donation to the BMB!

Everyone, please step out of your comfort zone and ask companies to donate.
This is the MONTH for giving... and we could use the donations!

Also, remind everyone about the BMB candles.
They truly are darling and for the month of DEC.
I'm going to REDUCE the price t0 $15+5 to ship.
100% of the proceeds go STRAIGHT to the baskets!
So order NOW!!!!

Paul Cardall

I was very humbled and EXCITED to receive Paul's CD's in the mail yesterday!
My incredible, dear friend ASHLEY, emailed Paul telling him a little about HER story and then about the BMB. Paul's reply... "Bless you guys for all your doing!!
The world needs more people like you."

ASHLEY, thank you for bringing BMB to Pauls attention. I love you!

PAUL, your music is inspiring, comforting, and absolutely perfect for our gift baskets.
Thank you for ALL that you do, and ALL the lives you have touched!

National ADOPTION Day!!!

Nia Vardalos
Watch This!

Introducing...

BMB candles

Yummy Chewy Chocolate Chip

22oz and 190-210 hours of burn time
For the month of DEC. only
$15 + 5 to ship

100% proceeds will go to the Birth Mother Baskets.

These would make the cutest Christmas gift for your family, friends or loved ones whose lives have been touched by ADOPTION...
and for those of you who just want to donate to a good cause.
Please, help me support other birth moms by purchasing a BMB candle.

Best Friends In The WHOLE world!

I have the best TWO friends, who took me to Bath & Body Works today
and helped my buy 24 things of lotion & shower gel for the bmbs!
I am so grateful for these two beautiful girls, who help me accomplish a dream
of filling sooo many baskets.
They support me, love me, listen to me and let me scream when I need to let it ALL out.
I love you Jill and Mena. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
For your love & support!

The Night Before...

'my baby' placed where her name would have been for privacy reasons.

Thursday night was the first time I really had the chance to hold my baby. I will never forget our first moment together. My mother took me into the nursery where she was, and the nurse put her into my arms. I stared into those beautiful big eyes. My heart was throbbing. She was amazing and she gazed up at me with such innocence. My understanding of love grew that day. I felt the first feelings of being a proud mother. It was unbelievable how much love I felt for her. A feeling came over me so strongly, it caught me off guard. It stung at my heart and echoed in my head... "she doesn't belong to me"
I left the hospital Sunday morning with my baby in my arms. I thought I would have more time with her in the hospital, but I didn't and I wasn't ready to say goodbye just yet. I needed and wanted more time with her and my social worker encouraged me to go at my own pace. The ride home was a blur and I felt numb to any emotion or thought. All I wanted to do, was to sit in the rocking chair and hold her, until I had every feature of hers memorized.
My family all came over that night. They all had a chance to hold her, take pictures with her and love her. I don't know that I will ever fully understand their emotions that night, or what they have been through with my decision to place. My baby was apart of us all, not just me. She was their niece, cousin and granddaughter. It was difficult to watch everyone crowd around her as a family and I sat back to enjoy a view that I may never see again.
That night is when I really took the time to get to know my baby. I watched her as she slept. I was mesmerized by her touch. I wanted to remember everything about her. I whispered to her, hoping in my heart that she would remember my voice. I cried as she lay beside me, and my mind raced over thoughts of her life that I would miss: her first smile, her first hug, her first day of school, her wedding. They flooded my mind, every important event that I would never see. Would she ever know how much I wanted to be with her? How much I cared for her?
I did not know, but in my mind that night, I could see us together laughing as old friends would and sharing memories of all the important events I had missed.

{ the following morning I did the 'hand off' }

A Birth Mother Basket

Contains: fleece blanket, candle, butterfly journal, Bath & Body Works lotion set with loaf, necklace, shampoo & conditioner, bath salts, Mary Kay lipstick samples, one free subscription to UTAH VALLEY magazine, purple frame with 'my little butterfly' poem. {Tissue paper, basket, ribbon and tag}

Hopefully this gives you all a better idea of what the baskets look like and what items we need for them.
Please, post bmb on your blogs, facebook, twitter and keep your eye open for sales on lotions, bath salts, frames and such.
I'd love a 'heads up' on things that I could buy for the baskets.
Thank you to EVERYONE who has donated!!

Choosing Adoption

I had to make a decision. I had to know what I was going to do, and it was scary to think I had to make this decision on my own. It was the biggest decision I would ever make in my life. It wasn't like choosing what to wear that day, or what I'm going to eat for lunch. This was my baby's future, my babies life, and I was in the position to make the decision of where her life would be. How could I make such an important decision? My family was so supportive, but when it came right down to it, it was my decision and no one else could tell me what to do. I knew the only one who could help me was God. I spent many hours on my knees praying for an answer. Every morning, every afternoon, every night I would pray with a sincere heart knowing that God would send me some kind of sign. Days and weeks went by and I had no answer. I was frustrated with myself and God. Why wasn't I getting an answer?
I felt unbelievable guilt. Did I even deserve an answer, after everything I had done wrong? Was God still there listening to my prayers? All of these questions lingered in my head, repeating over and over again as I prayed. Are you there God? I needed an answer. I needed to know what God thought was best. His guidance was the only way I could find strength in my decision later on in life.
I drove around in my truck one night, listening to music and continuing to pray for any kind of answer. I still wasn't sure God was even listening. I started to ask myself these questions... Why should I give my baby away when I knew I could be a great mom?
Would he/she ever know the love I have for them?
What if I saw my baby and just couldn't give him/her away?
There were so many questions and no one to answer then except for me. I was determined to get an answer, and I wasn't going to stop driving around until I felt God had heard my prayers. I continued praying until it hit me! Every reason I wanted to keep my baby was for selfish reasons. I wanted my baby because...
I wanted to prove to everyone that I could do it.
I wanted someone to love and love me back.
I wanted to dress my baby in cute clothes. lol!
I knew deep down inside, they were not reasons that would give my baby the best life possible. If I wanted him/ her to have an eternal family and have the best life possible, I had to place my baby for adoption. I stopped my truck as warmth came over my entire body. I could feel the spirit so strong around me, like nothing I had ever felt before. Tears came freely as I felt so much love and protection. He was there! He was there holding me and I could feel his presence. I could feel the spirit again and it was so indescribable. He had been there all along waiting for me. Waiting for me to make the decision, and he was there to confirm whether my decision was right or not. He waited for me, to know for myself, that this decision was best. On my way home, I kept repeating in my head...

"I never said it would be easy,
I only said it would be worth it."